How Do You Change?


This is one I have struggled with. We all know that to get older, to become a parent, to become a really great grown up, good employee, business owner. What ever we want to become there needs to be change.

We need to change.

But, it’s hard. Sometimes getting out of the bed in the morning, turning up to your day, smiling. Sometimes we  just can’t be bothered, can’t do it.

Yet we know, the life we want, the future we want – the life of our dreams [and all the utter cobblers] is somewhere. Just out of reach most of the  time.  And then we have…

YOLO – which is a cop out. YOLO means we can ‘piss people’ off in order to make us happier. Indicates we don’t have to take the crap from others. But that also is wrong.

See, we all have to be more ‘love you’ and a lot less ‘FU’. Simple, our lives, modern live is already aggressive enough thank you.

YOLO is a meme, a social media thing, Flippant not serious.

And the change you and I seek is mostly an internal thing. Sure more money will be helpful, people being less demanding will also be helpful, the right job, the right friends, lover!

None of these things will change your life, change how you feel. The only thing they will solve is for a temporary moment a glimpse of your future you will have respite, and when that ends you will be back where you were. Thinking that you need some change.

My answer this is here.

Any change is an internal thing. It has to come from within. It is the thoughts between your ears that need to change. Once you get those under control everything changes. Quite simply because it is the only thing you control. It is the only thing that guarantees your future happiness, your future success.


The only way you can control this is to start with meditation. To get that in first thing every day, from there spending some time alone with your thoughts.

Mulling over events and ideas, just being quiet, listening to your all knowing inner voice – no not the negative nutter that lives with you, the real one. The creative one, the one with all of the ideas. Your inner expert. That one, spending time with them is powerful.

Then, once you have that under your control. Focus, on the things you need to do, the things you need to not do [more important than doing] things will soon start to move, to get the change you desire.

This works because it forces you to create change that you desire, that serves you. You take control of your own thoughts, and your thoughts drive everything you do. And you can’t change until you have these under control.

Go give it a try, for the next couple of days. Schedule in some quiet time, some mediation time, write down your thoughts in a journal, after a week or so go back over your notes, look for the AHA moments. The things you should really consider as important.

The more you practice meditation, mindfulness, turning up to now, to today. The more change you will get.

All of this really is as simple as turning up to the present moment, easing the chatter inside your head and being able to listen to the real you. Only then will you be able to spot the things that make the difference.

From there you can begin to focus on them.

Ready for more on this. You can ‘borrow my brain’ as a one off using the link below.

Change Your Life 


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